Kendall Jenner Saves The Oppressed With A Pepsi

Kendall Jenner

Kendall Jenner, one of two of the Jenner/Kardashian  offspring with her almost original face, has now become the “White Flower Of Justice” according to Pepsi. The 118 years-old soft drink company, founded in Delaware, released a controversial commercial on the Good Lord’s Tuesday (yesterday).

Donning a blonde wig, couture digs and serving good face because modeling is her ACTUAL job, Jenner finds herself in the midst of “somethin’ a stirrin’ “. *cue old Negro spiritual voice*

There are scores of people from all walks of life, nationalities and ethnicities. Pepsi took great effort to highlight marginalized groups like blacks, Muslims and members of the LGBT community. Their faces were serious and full of purpose.  Ironically, the whites seated at the restaurant and the duo of Rebeccas posing with peace signs were effervescing while drinking ice cold Pepsi.

Sounds like real life, right?

We know damn well that you can’t start a revolution without a Marley tune playing in the background. Because white folks, the Marleys and raging against the machine go hand in hand.

Coins and having to work are patently inconsequential to Kendall because she leaves the her work site like a muthafucking BAWSE to see what’s going on. What in the Rachel Dolezal fuck? Due to her genetic makeup care of Kris Jenner, she cannot NOT have the spotlight on anything but her. And God forbid there are far more important issues or people than a Jenner/ Kardashian.

So what does Kendall Jenner do?

Ms. Kendall strips off her blonde wig. “Why come?”, you ask.

See below.

According to the good “Book of Taylor Swift Chapter 12: 5-9:

“Thou shalt not Becky whilst being blonde. Oh ye wretched brunettes tainted by the blood of the Asiatic, lyrical black man. Thou shalt only becomest a delicate white flower in the garden of alabaster grace, privilege and hip hop if thou art willing to sacrifice thy soul for  fodder and fuckery. Amen” 

Also See the Book of Iggy.

In true Becky form , she ditches the couture clothing for some regular ass denim which probably, still, cost a stack. But had she NOT changed her attire,  she would have appeared to be obtuse as fuck. Kendall Jenner is NOW one of us. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas girl!

Kendall sauntered through the crowd, giving high fives and smiles and shit. She passes the bucket-o-Pepsi, grabs a can and makes her way to the front of the crowd where the popos are standing all tight-assed and stern. She reaches to give the young cop the pop (I’m from Detroit. FIGHT ME!) and he didn’t even shoot her.  Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Not only did he not shoot her. He smiled along with the other cops around him. Who knew the thirst was THAT real?

I have questions. When are they going to start cloning Kendall Jenner to sell as protection for the good colored folks of the land? Will she come with a Pepsi? I prefer the throwback Pepsi with the real sugar though.

This is seemingly the happiest protest in the history of protests. The good negros are singing and dancing  shucking and jiving. Becky is the creme in the middle of  Oreo cookie sandwich and she’s not even crying rape.  The Muslim sister is taking pictures and not even one fat, sloppy Walmart mom pulled off her hijab. Hell, ICE didn’t even sweep for ilegales.

“And I didn’t even have to use my AK… Today was a good day!”

 

 

 

K. Araújo, a native Detroiter, is a cross between Claire Huxtable, Rosie Pérez and Millie Jackson. Widow, professional dragger of filth and Mami to the dopest Ethiopian EVER, she is the Editor in Chief of “Negra With Tumbao” and a Staff Writer for “The Urban Twist”. Keka has been known to shake what her mama gave her, is the hell and high water, an expert salsera and cussologist and is and forever shall be- unapologetically black.

  • Numbah5

    I’m laid clean out! My soul done withered away with the Book of Taylor Swift.

  • NonyaB🎯

    THIS is the kinda savagery I needed on this good wednesday. Also, I want someone to ask this “White Flower Of Justice” how she’s travelling back and forth in time to spread her pepsi of peace because she’s being page everywhere:

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/26f0c3911a63dcecda157695230ae3b153b3b1a06c559a0889e480be5a49e589.jpg

    • Thank you, sis! Please feel free to share!

      You know that delicate little flower didn’t think she’d have to do actual WORK. She just wanted to rock her ugly denim suit and wipe off lipstick in peace…. The fuck?

  • Calvin

    Why the hate for Beyoncé’s latest Pepsi commercial? More fallout from her protest at the stupid bowl last year…oh, wait. Never mind. That’s another useless white woman who’s allowed to be useless just because she’s white. When will that kartrashian family be dropped in an active volcano?
    *yes, that picture you chose of her with the purple lipstick makes me think of Beyoncé with half a glance at it.

  • AKA The Sauce

    This is why we love you….SAVAGE!!!!!!!

  • BatmansExWife

    I just can’t! I’m going to get in trouble for my laughing and lack of work activity today. Hilarious.

  • Mr. Mooggyy

    And just like that, a Kardashian fucks shyt up! Well played NWT! Well played!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/dde9d4bd451520319411feb3fa3ae9eed5b08cd1761b25875a4383bb270e7cfb.gif

  • Mary Burrell

    Great piece NWT👍🏿

  • SB

    Man, the commercial would’ve ‘worked’ if they just had her join the crowd and ditch the cop part. It still would’ve been pandering as fuck, but not biting off Ieshia Evans’s iconic pic. However! I’m here for the memes.

    • Blueberry01

      Of course, they have to bite of an iconic pic with a black girl (shout out to Ieshia Evans) fighting opposition – and reclaim it as something carefree and inconsequential.

      Wasn’t there a Betsy DeVos picture doing the same thing to Ruby Bridges?

  • truthseeker2436577@yahoo.com

    Very accurate work Sister. The commercial is an example of culture vulture action to the fullest. We have systematic problems effecting tons of communities and a Pepsi won’t solve them. Ironically enough, the same corporate forces which economically benefit from our oppression exploit our oppression with that commercial. Pepsi has backfired, because tons of people are opposing this overt mockery of sincere protest & activist movements for social change. Police are trained to kill first and ask questions later. If cops kill unarmed black people in a regular basis (which is true), then we face an epidemic of police misconduct. No white woman can save me. We can only save ourselves as black people.

    • Thank you!!!! AND not ONE lie was told here today!!!!

      • truthseeker2436577@yahoo.com

        You’re Welcome Sister.

    • Blueberry01

      To be frank, some of these white women have been directly responsible for the violence against black people.

      How, exactly are they supposed to SAVE us?😒

      • truthseeker2436577@yahoo.com

        Exactly. Emmett Till, the Scottsboro boys, the Black Wall Street pogroms, and other terrorist actions against black people existed via the lies of racist white women.

  • Sigma_Since 93

    I love you. Keep the Savagery coming!!!

  • WeJammingStill

    Preach Sister.

  • Mochasister

    Ain’t nothing wrong with saying pop! Us Midwestern Negros have to stick together! ;^)

  • Blueberry01

    Oh.My.God.😂😂😂

  • Val

    Lol @ Also see book of Iggy