If I Could Bring My Daddy Back, I Would Never Be Too Busy Again

Slipping My Daddy a kiss
Today, I was in the car clearing out my voicemails and I came across one from my Daddy on 11/4/2016. It was 34 seconds long. I had never listened to it.
 
I’ve had meltdowns for most of the day with some bouts of laughter.Yemi had a meltdown in school. She emailed me to tell me that she was having a rough time. She had no idea that I was going through the same thing. It’s been A REALLY SHITTY DAY for Yemi and me.
 

I press play and the first thing I heard was my Daddy saying,

 

“Keka! What’s happening ole big head girl? You’re my daughter and I gotta call you sometimes and find out how you doing and make sure you’re alright…. so um uuuum.. I’ma get off the phone now and call somebody else.. Uuum *voice lowers* I know you’re busy…Later Big Head.. And how my Big head gdaughter doing? You know that’s my angel…. Later baby…..”

Daddy
My Daddy and I at my baby sister’s 40th birthday party!
I am positive that was him trying to comfort me and make me smile. 
 
My biggest regret right now was being too busy for my Daddy at times. Too busy to call. Too busy to come home. Just too fucking busy being busy.
 
I promise if I could have just one more day with him, I would take every call. I would say, “I love you, Daddy!” until he couldn’t take it anymore. I would cook him homemade chicken soup and lamb chops until I had to roll him to the bed. And I would let him know every minute of the day how grateful and proud I am to be his daughter.
 
I would be willing to give my own life just to let my Daddy know that I was never too busy for him. I just never thought that he would be gone so soon. I thought I had until tomorrow….
K. Araújo, a native Detroiter, is a cross between Claire Huxtable, Rosie Pérez and Millie Jackson. Widow, professional dragger of filth and Mami to the dopest Ethiopian EVER, she is the Editor in Chief of “Negra With Tumbao” and a Staff Writer for “The Urban Twist”. Keka has been known to shake what her mama gave her, is the hell and high water, an expert salsera and cussologist and is and forever shall be- unapologetically black.

  • I am so so sorry for your loss. I lost my own Daddy over 3 years ago now and it still hurts like a sonofagun. Sending you love and strength.

  • Val

    I lost my mom years ago and I still get the urge to pick up the phone and call her. So I understand. My prayers for you, NWT.

    *eHUG*

    • Thank you, sis!!!! I know that is a pain that can never be erased! <3

  • Mary Burrell

    Bless you Negra sorry for your loss.

  • truthseeker2436577@yahoo.com

    Condolences to you and your family. Prayers to you.

    • Thank you!!

      • truthseeker2436577@yahoo.com

        You’re Welcome Sister.

  • Glo

    I understand completely–My mother passed on Feb 22, 2017. It’s extremely heartbreaking and painful beyond words.

    Not sure if you actually live in MI anymore, but Sweet Potato Sensations over on Lahser has a grief support group for black women, if you are interested in that type of thing.

    I hope you can be ok one day. You have my empathy sis.

  • Thank you for this!!!! I am definitely an old ass, spoiled Daddy’s girl. My Dad would get me anything I asked for (in spite of me being in my 40’s) until being diagnosed with bone cancer 3 years ago, which he hid from me as long as he could. I was devastated. Your blog post just made me text him (he’s in Cali, I’m in Alabama) and ask how his cardiologist appointment went yesterday. Thanks to you, I will never be too busy for him ever again *tears*